The Tartar Steppe by Dino Buzzati is a profound exploration of the human tendency toward self-deception.

The novel follows Lieutenant Giovanni Drogo, who spends a lifetime waiting for a war that he believes will bring him glory. From the moment he arrives at the desolate Bastiani Castle, stationed on the edge of the barren Tartar desert, Giovanni senses the futility of his assignment. Yet, he stays.

While his friends move on with their lives—falling in love, marrying, raising children, and advancing in their careers—Giovanni remains at the castle. He clings to the hope that one day, enemies will appear on the horizon, and he will have his moment of valor. But that war never comes. Giovanni spends his entire life in quiet isolation, his dreams fading into the monotony of waiting.

Aren’t many of us like Giovanni?

Don’t we wait endlessly for love from partners who may never give it?
Don’t we tell ourselves that someday we’ll pursue our dream job?
We say:
I’ll start writing that novel.
I’ll make that film.
I’ll move to that city or country where everything will be better.
But we never do.

I know people who’ve been saying, “I’ll start writing,” for 30 years.
I know others who’ve talked about changing their lives for decades.
Yet these changes never happen.

We are like Giovanni. We build our castles of comfort and convince ourselves that salvation will find us. We wait for miracles. But they don’t come.

Here’s the harsh truth: they won’t come.

The love you’re waiting for from your partner? It will never materialize—because you chose them for a reason. You unconsciously recreated the emotional emptiness of your childhood, a space where your needs were unmet and your worth went unacknowledged. Your relationship feels familiar, not fulfilling.

And those dreams? Writing, creating, moving?
They exist outside your current identity. To pursue them would mean stepping beyond who you are now, into a space that feels foreign and uncertain. That step is frightening. It demands that you abandon the comfort of the familiar, that you surrender the safety of your castle.

Life coach Darrell Rutherford describes this as living in a box. He writes:

“If you have a concept of reality (and everybody does), you live in a box. Everyone lives in a box! Everything belonging in that box is already there. Everything you want from life that you don’t have is outside the box. The odds are that you will never get to have what you want from life, simply because your wants are not powerful enough to overcome the insecurity of being outside the box.”

Our castles, our boxes, feel safe. But they are prisons, too.

If we want to change, we must dare to step outside. Yes, it will be uncomfortable. Yes, it will be terrifying. But growth doesn’t happen in comfort. Miracles don’t arrive at castle gates.

So, let’s take that step. Let’s risk discomfort for the possibility of something greater.

Life begins when we leave the safety of the castle.

Hits: 5